I'll excuse myself

jacqueline | July 11, 2023, 2:23 a.m. Attempt At Short Stories

Scarlett was never one to cover up her overpowering personality. She shined bright and she never tried to dim her light. Her mere presence would cast shadows far and wide. Anyone who would have liked to express an opinion or individuality would be quickly blinded by Scarlett and her bravado. 

She dressed in elaborate flowery clothing and her hair was always up high outlining her strong jaw. She walked with her nose up high, sometimes so high she'd run into anyone with a height below her own, since her gaze never went down as she walked. Some would say she lived in the clouds of her own reign where she wore the crown. 

It was a very strange day the day I ran into Scarlett. I was late for a train and in a hurry. I didn't have time for someone to stop me dead in my tracks to take my place in a taxi I hailed for myself. 

"Excuse me miss, I believe this taxi was meant for me, as I was the one to wave it down." I said, sticking my foot in the door as she tried to slam it behind her loud flower filled dress. "Be a gentleman dear and catch another." She said as she waved her hand to dismiss me. 

Of course, infuriated, I squished right in and gave my orders to the taxi "8th Avenue, Penn Station and step on it." like two pees in a very uncomfortable pod. "Excuse me! Excuse me! Stop this taxi this instant!" I threw a fifty to the driver and let him know money wasn't an obstacle. I wasn't missing my train. Taking the bill as if training his whole life for this moment he smiled through the review mirror with a sparkle in his eye. "He was the one who hailed the cab ma'am." And stepped right on the gas as I asked. What a guy, I felt so validated. Me and this ungodliness of a woman and my new friend the taxi driver. My frustration began to dissipate as I felt the distance between me and the train lessening with every mile. 

Small victories are always my favorite. I checked my clock; we would probably make it with time to spare. No need to argue with this inconvenience of a person plastered up against the window to my left. It wasn't until we reached our first red light that I realized the mistake I had made and the woman with which I chose to share a cab with. 

She rolls up her unbelievably large dress and without saying one word pulls out two tiny guns, one strapped to her left and the other to her right thigh. She looks at the driver and calmly says "727 Fifth Avenue" She places the gun close to my buddy, who I just met today and have no basis as to how he'll respond. He looks up through the rearview, eyebrows up and past his forehead, if they could have run back right off of his head they would have. Without another reaction he spins the car around and takes off to 727 Fifth Avenue. Running red lights and passing pedestrians like oncoming cars, we would go left then right in a frenzy. The car was in a panic, and we were its ecosystem. 

The color had left my face and my thoughts went blank. I couldn't even remember why I needed to go to the train. All I could think about was why I let this woman disturb my entire existence. I looked at the barrel of a tiny gun pointed right at my face. "M-m-mam, do you mind putting that down?" She looked at me with her bulging eyes with eyelashes weighted down by mascara. For a mere moment I wondered how her eyelids were capable of opening, but then quickly returned to panic. Pushing back into my own window trying to squish myself into a fly. 

She cocked the gun, pointed it right at my face...the suspense was killing me. 

"Are you getting in or what?" Scarlett stared at me with her bulging eyes and overly coated eyelashes. I was holding the door open in a blank stare. Just in absolute shock that this woman had been so rude. 

I stepped back, didn't say a word and closed the door. "Could you imagine if I had gotten in the car with that woman? Who knows what she was capable of. Not too much longer another taxi came, and I hopped right in. I made it to my train with time to spare."

My wife stared blankly into my eyes. I smiled. "But other than that, it was a great day sweety, how was your day?"

:P